Wheeldon on tour

Relax, this is not going to be a lengthy diatribe about the rights and wrongs of the EU. It's going to be a medium-sized diatribe about where on the map Europe is. Now I did GCSE & A-level geography and whilst I'm no cartographer I can clearly remember where Europe ends and Asia starts. I want to be clear about this.

Armenia is NOT in Europe
Azerbaijan is also NOT in Europe

How did these countries get classed as European? Does the man in charge or UEFA not have a map? Is the boss of Eurovision on the take?
Hell, Israel only gets in because they daren't go to most of the rest of Asia.
Why not let Morocco in? They're nearer to Spain than Armenia.
I'm not saying they're bad countries, ran by inferior or corrupt governments or anything. Just that they're in ASIA.

Here's a set of emails between me and the Health and Safety officer in the office

Me: I have a Health & Safety question.
This afternoon, whilst in the swimming pool, I saw a lane rope across the pool and wondered if I could limbo underneath. I couldn't and almost put my back out (and might have drowned). Is it possible for some aqualimbo training to be organised? I'd hate Adrian or Nicos to have an accident (or even a claim!)

H&S: As for Aqualimbo related hazards. I will obviously need to firstly check government regulations on Aqualimboing in a public place, then perform a full and thourough risk assessment for wich more details would be helpful. Any information you can provide on lane width, limbo style used, swimwear issues and indeed use of floatation devices will all help me to create a full and detailed picture of the issue, which I will then colour in and send back!

Me: OK, we've had a look at the pool. Are these measurements enough?

Depth 1.5m
Lane width 1.75m
Length 17m
Temp 20C

I used the traditional Aqualimbo style, whilst Adrian uses the more
unusual Nordic style.

Swimwear: Adrian wears a pair of swimming shorts that take garish to whole
new level. I wear a pair of revealing speedos. Would you like a photo to
help your risk assessment?

No unauthorised floating equipment will be used. We don't want to run the
risk of being banned by the governing body (International Federation of
Aqualimbo) and miss the Worlds in June.

We look forward to your reply.

H&S: Thanks for the info boys! I will process this and pass on to the relevent body which has incidentaly changed its name and is no longer the international federation of aqualimbo but now know as the Final Word Of Aqualimbo Regulations or FWOAR! for short! - I can for see know problems RE swim wear, I feel photos will not be needed as I now have a very clear yet not altogether welcome image in my mind - Thanks!!